Balancing Stress of the World

I regretfully say that it's - again - been awhile. Just as I thought I was inspired to write more frequently, I turned away. I've got a handful of drafts started, but couldn't bring myself to continue writing about them because the topics are a bit more personal than I want to share at this point. It's challenging for me because people that are in my life know that I share that stuff readily, but revealing those personal stories to the faceless online world is quite different. So I, ahem, overthink about what it is I want to share. Today it's a bit easier though.

The topic today is that ever so common "S" word, stress. If you look up a definition of stress, it lists words like, strain, worry, and tension (and I must note, than on one web page I looked it, one of the banner ads flashing above the definition of stress, was talking about Stage 4 cancer. Really? Someone had to go there?). Wouldn't you say that stress is one of the biggest epidemics we all share? For myself, 99.9% of my stress, my tension, is self-induced and self-created (the first step is admitting you have a problem, right??). But good God look at all the stress that is out there in daily life! It is no coincidence that I am writing about this as the nation is focused on the devastation in Moore, Oklahoma. Yet we're still surrounded by the aftermath of the Boston Marathon bombing and the freeing of the missing girls from Ohio, 9/11 is a part of our daily language now, and of course, we get news daily of military happenings from around the world. Locally we have heard story after story of bodies being found, and women who have gone missing. On smaller scales, but just as stressful for all of us are family matters, lost pets, financial matters, job stress, health issues, ... the list goes on and on. Just this morning, a friend of mine was stressed about not taking pictures at a wedding she was at this past weekend. Stress isn't just shootings and bombings and natural disasters. It's the "Dammit-I-should-have..." thoughts, and the, "What-do-we-do-now" instances every minute of every day. (Hell, I stress out when I go over my self-imposed Coke allotment for the day.) So with all of us constantly bombarded and surrounded by stress, someone please tell me why we willingly seek it out more?

This occurred to me last night as I turned off the Oklahoma tornado coverage and turned on our local news. I was about five minutes early and caught the end of the show Revelation. It's a TV show, so it's mindless entertainment, right? I'd never seen it before, but in those few minutes, I saw a story that contained back-stabbing, distress, and people threatening to kill one another. I looked at my husband while shaking my head and said, "I just don't get it. There's so much of that crap in the real world, why do we seek out MORE of it as entertainment?" It's difficult to find an escape if you turn on the TV, and even if you avoid the news. Most of TV today is "reality" or reality, where people yell and scream at one another, play one another, lie, cheat and steal. Then there's the drama shows usually surrounding scandalous love affairs and murder. I'm sorry, but why is that entertaining? Admittedly and thankfully, I have not been directly impacted by either an affair or a murder, but even the thought of watching stories about that stuff is far from mindless entertainment for me because I know people really experience those things. I don't watch medical drama shows because I find nothing entertaining about life and death matters. And how can it be entertaining for someone who has been impacted by a murder, an affair, or a life and death matter? It worries me that we find such things entertaining.

Now I'm sure some of you are saying, "They are just stories," and yes, you're right. But to me, and I'm sure lots of people like me, they are stories based on an aspect of real life somewhere. Everything is inspired by something that comes from experience. If someone has been through a plane crash, are they really going to run to the theatre to see Flight? Or how about Twister. Do you think do you think any of the people from Moore, Oklahoma are going to watch it anytime soon? 
 



On a way less real scale, this past Sunday, my husband and I went to see Iron Man 3. I was looking forward to the special effects and the continuation of the story, and I like a good story. But I gotta admit that there was probably about 10 minutes of the movie where I closed my eyes, turned my head, or checked my phone. I just don't see how even in stories, people getting shot, killed, blown-up, kidnapped or terrorized is enjoyable on any level. Not to mention the feeling of justification when the bad guys get theirs. My anxiety kept going up and my heart was racing. I feel that way enough outside of a movie theatre, but yet I just paid money to go feel that way.  


I've noticed that as I have gotten older (I'm only 38), more and more I chose to watch less and less TV, and go to fewer and fewer movies for that reason. Sure there are things to take away from those shows and films, but in my little life, those experiences can come from other places, like even the real life dramas, stresses and traumas happening. Sure I'm more emotional, sympathetic and empathetic than I maybe should be, which is why these things hit me so hard. But I am one person trying hard to cut down on the amount of stress in my life, and it's a fine line between being informed about everything (i.e. watching and reading the news), and taking it all in. It's a fine line between being entertained and seeing the reality of what I'm watching. For those of you that can watch that stuff and not take it in, I am envious.

That's why I watch sports, and shows like Dancing with the Stars, Modern Family, re-runs of sitcoms like Friends, Scrubs, or That 70s Show. They may hit on real topics, but they don't have the extent of real life drama per se. Call it denial if you want to, but it's my way to escape the reality of life sometimes, to bring some simplicity in, and to laugh amidst the bad and the sad. Heck, I even watch cartoons, the good ones from when I was a kid. I had that put into perspective for me during the events of 9/11/01. I heard on the news a bit about a man who didn't know how to explain what had happened to his kids, so he did the best he could, his kid responded by saying how stupid it was for people to fly planes into buildings, and then they did what he thought was the most simple and pure form of escape on a night like that - he and his kid watched cartoons. I thought it was brilliant. 

For the rest of today and tonight, I am going to keep an eye on what is happening down south with the storms and the tornado aftermath, I'm going to watch Anderson Cooper for a bit, but I am also going watch the Dancing with the Stars finals, and perhaps maybe an episode of Animaniacs while getting a Twins game score. A good dose of reality mixed with a good dose of escapism. For me, it's best to not ignore either one, and highly important to learn how to not take in the reality so much. Balance. I'm trying...

Until next time (whenever that may be!)...